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Welcome to America (home invasion style!)
Short version: A guy broke into my house while I was there. He wasn't very threatening, but he attempted to hug/grope me and only left my home once he could hear that I was on the line with 911 dispatch. I'm fine and am staying with friends for tonight now that the police are done at my house. John is flying in tomorrow anyhow, so he can help me deal with stuff then.
Long version below (and I can't figure out how to put in a cut on the beta create entries page which I'm using... ugh). It is rambly as, you know, it's been one heck of a weird night.
I was sitting at home, alone, around 9pm, when some dude walked into my house through the back and started trying to strike a conversation with me. What's your name, do you have a boyfriend, the like. He backed off a little bit when I said I was talking to said boyfriend *right then*, but still didn't leave despite me asking him repeatedly to do so.
I really was on voice chat with some friends, including my boyfriend, so they must have had the strangest experience while I was clearly talking with this intruder in my house. I left the channel open the whole time, so they were treated to listening to me talk with the police too.
Anyhow, he kept trying to talk to me and I kept alternating between keeping him talking and asking him to leave. He eventually asked for a hug and tried to grope me when he moved in for one, whereupon I realized my cell phone was within reach and picked it up to call the police. (None of my friends on TS managed to do so first, since John was apparently still trying to find the local number. In future, friends, feel free to call 911 and try to get them to sort it out.) The guy was *clearly* going to hang around my house until he actually heard me on the phone with 911 dispatch.
I'm guessing it would have been an attempted sexual assault (I suppose the attempted grope already is, but a more serious one) if I hadn't indicated that I was talking to people right then. As was, that was it, and my phone was nearby so I called the police without having to tangle with him.
It was all... very surreal. He wasn't really threatening exactly, more a little mentally not right, the sort of person you see a lot of in Albuquerque at bus stops, to be honest. I'm used to talking things out with drunk/scary weird people as necessary and staying out of reach, so that was easy enough. He wasn't a very serious physical threat to me: even horrifically sick and a mediocre martial artist who's barely been home long enough to adapt to altitude, I probably could have taken him. There were heavy metal table legs within reach and I'm pretty sure I could have brained him before he reacted, but I wasn't sure what I'd do next, and keeping everything calm made it easier for me to call 911, so it was probably the best thing to do. The best fights are the ones you don't get into, right?
He was a bit taller than me, maybe 5'6", mostly bald, gray windbreaker jacket of somesort. White, but skin seemed a bit grayish possibly due to the light but it seemed more likely to be dirt or possibly disease? Probably around 30ish. He told me his name, but I honestly couldn't remember it. I was too busy wondering whether he'd just walked into my back door and what the hell I was going to do to secure it once I got him out of the house. Medium build, maybe on the scrawny side, and didn't look very strong or able to react to anything quickly.
Turns out he didn't get in through the back door, although he apparently tried it. (I may come from Canada, but I lock my doors.) In the end, he removed the screen on the kitchen window then pushed it open and the pretty-but-ineffective 1927 original window hardware offered no resistance. He left a bottle of booze; apparently the police managed to get some latent fingerprints off that. (They really do use dust and scotch tape. I watched for a bit for something to do.) They figured they'd try for DNA out of the bottle too so they could put it all on file, which is a lot more than I expected to be honest. I doubt anything will come of it, but he could be in the system already and they had squad cars searching the area, and even did a fly-over (!) presumably with the chopper that I often see patrolling the skies when I walk home. They seemed much more concerned about catching him than I was, to be honest, but I suspect this is a perfect white-knight scenario for the cops and they were prepared to do as much as they could to make me feel safe, which is really nice of them. (it's their job, but still appreciated!)
I believe, in hindsight, that he'd knocked on my door earlier and I ignored it (I'm a woman home by herself; I'm not answering the door even during the day half the time unless you're standing there with a fedex truck and I'm expecting a package.), and may have made other noise too but I chalked that up to the next door neighbours, who I often hear coming in and out because their laneway goes right by the side of my house. In hindsight, I could have called the police and asked for a drive-by, but who expects someone to climb into their locked house? I just assumed it was the usual noises until there was a dude standing in the room with me.
The 911 dispatcher and the police were very nice, as one would expect. I had to call from my house in Ottawa once due to prank phone calls claiming they were watching the house, and I received a similar calibre of treatment in both cities, although obviously they were more concerned this time since I'd actually had an intruder. The funniest moment was when the inspector who came to do the prints came in, and did a double-take upon seeing me. Probably the same one I was doing, as I believe he was also at least part-Asian and there aren't many of us in the city so pretty much every time I encounter another we do this little double-take.
While I was on the phone to 911, John called a friend of his to come over and pick me up, and called the landlords to let them know what was going on. They're going to send someone over to look at the windows, and I'm staying with friends tonight. Friends with guns, which shouldn't really make me feel better but it does.
What comes next
I asked the officers what they recommend, and other than updating the windows, they recommend a gun and a dog. Obviously, I need to learn how to shoot a gun before it's worth owning one, so we'll work on that first. Being Canadian, I don't really think about guns much, but I can't see how it would possibly be a bad idea for me to know how to use one, and I'll decide whether I'll feel safer with one in the home once I'm proficient. But as was pointed out to me the gun screams threat in a way that I by myself or even me with sticks or swords never will no matter how much training and practice I get, and it's a ranged weapon (with any serious attacker, my best bet is to never get touched). So... when in America, eh? I'd been meaning to learn to shoot out of curiousity since I hear there's a really cheap range nearby, so I'm just going to make that a priority now. If anyone has gun-related stuff to recommend in Albuquerque, or online resources, feel free to chime in. I am open to advice on this subject though I'll probably be a bit too busy to deal with it for a few days.
Meanwhile, I am actually partially proficient with a couple of smaller swords, and an unsheathed blade also could look enough like a threat (yeay for small asian ninja stereotypes), so I might see about getting something the right size for me so that I can grab it and look around menacingly while going for my phone if I hear a noise. Again, recommendations welcome for places to get such a thing on relatively short notice. I've worked with a bokken and a practice chinese broadsword/scimitar thing but not with real blades.
The dog is... actually a really good idea for me too. I had just been talking with John about volunteering for the local SPCA as dog walkers for exercise, and I knew it would be very hard for me to do that and not want one myself. So now I just know I need a bigger scarier looking dog than I might have chosen on my own. And I'll have to figure out safely walking him/her at night on my own, and who's going to take care of the dog when I'm travelling and stuff, but... let's be honest, I've wanted a dog since mine died when I was a kid, and I'm now motivated to make it work even with my somewhat transient life style. I'll wait 'till after the holidays so I'll be here for a long time to train and adapt.
We'll also look at putting in an alarm system. And brighter exterior lights. Those may get started over the next few days along with whatever the landlords decide to do to secure the windows. John's going to be here tomorrow (he was coming anyhow -- actually would have been here tonight if he hadn't had to be in California for a baby shower!) so he'll be able to help me figure this out over the next week.
But for now...
For now, the friend who came to pick me up helped me put new latches on the kitchen window and a couple of others that looked likely to have the same problem. And then we left and I'm here with an absolutely lovely couple in their absolutely lovely home in a nice second-floor bedroom away from anyone trying to get in. John will be here tomorrow so I'll go home with him and try to do more to secure the house, see if anything looks like it was stolen (don't think so, but the house is a shambles due to unpacking and sick). We can always stay at a hotel if it seems unsafe, but I'm pretty sure with both of us there we won't have any trouble. I'm fairly sure he only broke in because I was a woman sitting there on my own, as he could have easily stolen stuff if that were his motive.
Interesting fact: I have recently trained myself to give a fake name the same way I give a fake postal code, so if I start getting creepy notes for "Sara" I'll know this dude is back. I'm more concerned about someone else getting in than I really am about him, but dude was clearly not right, so I can't assume he'll be predictable.
The police are driving by regularly all weekend and I can call to request more drive-bys if it makes me feel better or I get a hint of anything suspicious. I'll see how I feel after tomorrow.
On the bright side, my brother tells me his friend got mugged at gunpoint his first night after moving to NYC, so at least it took me longer to get to my harsh introduction to the severe sketchiness of the USA.
Long version below (and I can't figure out how to put in a cut on the beta create entries page which I'm using... ugh). It is rambly as, you know, it's been one heck of a weird night.
I was sitting at home, alone, around 9pm, when some dude walked into my house through the back and started trying to strike a conversation with me. What's your name, do you have a boyfriend, the like. He backed off a little bit when I said I was talking to said boyfriend *right then*, but still didn't leave despite me asking him repeatedly to do so.
I really was on voice chat with some friends, including my boyfriend, so they must have had the strangest experience while I was clearly talking with this intruder in my house. I left the channel open the whole time, so they were treated to listening to me talk with the police too.
Anyhow, he kept trying to talk to me and I kept alternating between keeping him talking and asking him to leave. He eventually asked for a hug and tried to grope me when he moved in for one, whereupon I realized my cell phone was within reach and picked it up to call the police. (None of my friends on TS managed to do so first, since John was apparently still trying to find the local number. In future, friends, feel free to call 911 and try to get them to sort it out.) The guy was *clearly* going to hang around my house until he actually heard me on the phone with 911 dispatch.
I'm guessing it would have been an attempted sexual assault (I suppose the attempted grope already is, but a more serious one) if I hadn't indicated that I was talking to people right then. As was, that was it, and my phone was nearby so I called the police without having to tangle with him.
It was all... very surreal. He wasn't really threatening exactly, more a little mentally not right, the sort of person you see a lot of in Albuquerque at bus stops, to be honest. I'm used to talking things out with drunk/scary weird people as necessary and staying out of reach, so that was easy enough. He wasn't a very serious physical threat to me: even horrifically sick and a mediocre martial artist who's barely been home long enough to adapt to altitude, I probably could have taken him. There were heavy metal table legs within reach and I'm pretty sure I could have brained him before he reacted, but I wasn't sure what I'd do next, and keeping everything calm made it easier for me to call 911, so it was probably the best thing to do. The best fights are the ones you don't get into, right?
He was a bit taller than me, maybe 5'6", mostly bald, gray windbreaker jacket of somesort. White, but skin seemed a bit grayish possibly due to the light but it seemed more likely to be dirt or possibly disease? Probably around 30ish. He told me his name, but I honestly couldn't remember it. I was too busy wondering whether he'd just walked into my back door and what the hell I was going to do to secure it once I got him out of the house. Medium build, maybe on the scrawny side, and didn't look very strong or able to react to anything quickly.
Turns out he didn't get in through the back door, although he apparently tried it. (I may come from Canada, but I lock my doors.) In the end, he removed the screen on the kitchen window then pushed it open and the pretty-but-ineffective 1927 original window hardware offered no resistance. He left a bottle of booze; apparently the police managed to get some latent fingerprints off that. (They really do use dust and scotch tape. I watched for a bit for something to do.) They figured they'd try for DNA out of the bottle too so they could put it all on file, which is a lot more than I expected to be honest. I doubt anything will come of it, but he could be in the system already and they had squad cars searching the area, and even did a fly-over (!) presumably with the chopper that I often see patrolling the skies when I walk home. They seemed much more concerned about catching him than I was, to be honest, but I suspect this is a perfect white-knight scenario for the cops and they were prepared to do as much as they could to make me feel safe, which is really nice of them. (it's their job, but still appreciated!)
I believe, in hindsight, that he'd knocked on my door earlier and I ignored it (I'm a woman home by herself; I'm not answering the door even during the day half the time unless you're standing there with a fedex truck and I'm expecting a package.), and may have made other noise too but I chalked that up to the next door neighbours, who I often hear coming in and out because their laneway goes right by the side of my house. In hindsight, I could have called the police and asked for a drive-by, but who expects someone to climb into their locked house? I just assumed it was the usual noises until there was a dude standing in the room with me.
The 911 dispatcher and the police were very nice, as one would expect. I had to call from my house in Ottawa once due to prank phone calls claiming they were watching the house, and I received a similar calibre of treatment in both cities, although obviously they were more concerned this time since I'd actually had an intruder. The funniest moment was when the inspector who came to do the prints came in, and did a double-take upon seeing me. Probably the same one I was doing, as I believe he was also at least part-Asian and there aren't many of us in the city so pretty much every time I encounter another we do this little double-take.
While I was on the phone to 911, John called a friend of his to come over and pick me up, and called the landlords to let them know what was going on. They're going to send someone over to look at the windows, and I'm staying with friends tonight. Friends with guns, which shouldn't really make me feel better but it does.
What comes next
I asked the officers what they recommend, and other than updating the windows, they recommend a gun and a dog. Obviously, I need to learn how to shoot a gun before it's worth owning one, so we'll work on that first. Being Canadian, I don't really think about guns much, but I can't see how it would possibly be a bad idea for me to know how to use one, and I'll decide whether I'll feel safer with one in the home once I'm proficient. But as was pointed out to me the gun screams threat in a way that I by myself or even me with sticks or swords never will no matter how much training and practice I get, and it's a ranged weapon (with any serious attacker, my best bet is to never get touched). So... when in America, eh? I'd been meaning to learn to shoot out of curiousity since I hear there's a really cheap range nearby, so I'm just going to make that a priority now. If anyone has gun-related stuff to recommend in Albuquerque, or online resources, feel free to chime in. I am open to advice on this subject though I'll probably be a bit too busy to deal with it for a few days.
Meanwhile, I am actually partially proficient with a couple of smaller swords, and an unsheathed blade also could look enough like a threat (yeay for small asian ninja stereotypes), so I might see about getting something the right size for me so that I can grab it and look around menacingly while going for my phone if I hear a noise. Again, recommendations welcome for places to get such a thing on relatively short notice. I've worked with a bokken and a practice chinese broadsword/scimitar thing but not with real blades.
The dog is... actually a really good idea for me too. I had just been talking with John about volunteering for the local SPCA as dog walkers for exercise, and I knew it would be very hard for me to do that and not want one myself. So now I just know I need a bigger scarier looking dog than I might have chosen on my own. And I'll have to figure out safely walking him/her at night on my own, and who's going to take care of the dog when I'm travelling and stuff, but... let's be honest, I've wanted a dog since mine died when I was a kid, and I'm now motivated to make it work even with my somewhat transient life style. I'll wait 'till after the holidays so I'll be here for a long time to train and adapt.
We'll also look at putting in an alarm system. And brighter exterior lights. Those may get started over the next few days along with whatever the landlords decide to do to secure the windows. John's going to be here tomorrow (he was coming anyhow -- actually would have been here tonight if he hadn't had to be in California for a baby shower!) so he'll be able to help me figure this out over the next week.
But for now...
For now, the friend who came to pick me up helped me put new latches on the kitchen window and a couple of others that looked likely to have the same problem. And then we left and I'm here with an absolutely lovely couple in their absolutely lovely home in a nice second-floor bedroom away from anyone trying to get in. John will be here tomorrow so I'll go home with him and try to do more to secure the house, see if anything looks like it was stolen (don't think so, but the house is a shambles due to unpacking and sick). We can always stay at a hotel if it seems unsafe, but I'm pretty sure with both of us there we won't have any trouble. I'm fairly sure he only broke in because I was a woman sitting there on my own, as he could have easily stolen stuff if that were his motive.
Interesting fact: I have recently trained myself to give a fake name the same way I give a fake postal code, so if I start getting creepy notes for "Sara" I'll know this dude is back. I'm more concerned about someone else getting in than I really am about him, but dude was clearly not right, so I can't assume he'll be predictable.
The police are driving by regularly all weekend and I can call to request more drive-bys if it makes me feel better or I get a hint of anything suspicious. I'll see how I feel after tomorrow.
On the bright side, my brother tells me his friend got mugged at gunpoint his first night after moving to NYC, so at least it took me longer to get to my harsh introduction to the severe sketchiness of the USA.
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They do -- but unless you've practiced with the thing enough and continually (usually considered to be at the range several times a week, once you've established competence) that you're able to shoot a human attacker, and hit them, they're also a weapon that's easily taken away from you, and used against you.
That said, something like a shotgun is an area effect weapon (aim doesn't matter quite so much), and the shot won't travel quite as far as a bullet (since it sucks to discover that your walls are quite _that_ thin). Obviously a shotgun's a bit harder to keep in your bedside table, or as concealed carry ;P
Meanwhile, I am actually partially proficient with a couple of smaller swords, and an unsheathed blade also could look enough like a threat (yeay for small asian ninja stereotypes), so I might see about getting something the right size for me so that I can grab it and look around menacingly while going for my phone if I hear a noise. Again, recommendations welcome for places to get such a thing on relatively short notice. I've worked with a bokken and a practice chinese broadsword/scimitar thing but not with real blades.
FWIW, I've found that 'crazy' often deters more people than competent. It's possible to deal reasonably with somebody that seems competent, but you have no idea what somebody crazy is going to do (see also cornering rats, so to speak).
On the subject of edged weapons, although I do have swords/knives kicking around, the big chinese chopper and the overly long (18" or so) serrated bread knife seem to make people more nervous than the actual weapons. Hm. Thinking about that, something like a naginata would be pretty easy to rig up, even without a place to buy one directly, since it's essentially a knife at the end of a (sturdy) broomstick, and both of those are pretty easy to come by.
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Terri:
I'm in contact with John. If either you or John want, I'll have a shotgun FedExed out to Texas. As far as good fixed blades go, visit a sporting goods store and ask to look over their collection of hunting knives: you'll be able to find several good fixed blades there.
Regarding shotguns, don't believe the hype: a shotgun is not an "area effect weapon." Shotguns discharge pellets in a cone-shaped pattern. It starts off about 20mm at the muzzle and spreads another 20mm per meter. At a distance of five meters you're going to be putting pellets into a circle 12cm across. Aim is important: no shotgun will ever be able to compensate for someone who isn't going to use the ghost-rings.
A 12-gauge shotgun fires shells 18mm across and 70mm long. Within this shell is contained nine separate lead spheres, each almost exactly analogous to the 7.65mm bullet James Bond uses in his Walther PPK. They leave the muzzle traveling faster than sound. Pull the trigger and you're putting nine 7.65mm bullets into a circle 12cm across. The numbers make it sound very neat and scientific, but the result is bloody, barbaric, and decisive: whatever it was you shot, well, it's not what it was anymore.
A lot of people will give you a lot of well-intentioned advice about firearms safety. Most of these people don't know what they're talking about. You don't have any kids, so a lot of those rules are irrelevant to you. If you get a shotgun, whether from me or from anyone else, keep it loaded, a round in the chamber, with the safety on. If the time comes that you need a shotgun every second will count, so forget about keeping the shotgun and ammunition stored in two separate locked boxes in two separate rooms of your apartment. Loaded, chambered, safetied. Also remember that your finger never touches the trigger until you have made a conscious decision to fire. Keep it on the trigger guard instead, or along the side of the receiver, or whatever's comfortable for you, so long as your finger doesn't touch the trigger.
Practice, practice, practice. With the shotgun unloaded, practice picking up a safetied shotgun, shouldering it, making a firing position, desafetying it, and returning your finger to a safe position off the trigger. Do this until it becomes second nature to you. You need to repeat that motion until you can do it under stress without screwing it up.
Then practice the reverse: safetying the weapon, breaking position, and returning it to its proper place. Again, you need to be able to do it under stress without screwing up.
If you want to pursue this, tell John. He'll get in touch with me and we'll put everything in order. I'll also find a good shotgun range near you, so that you and John can head out there to get some live experience. I'm pretty sure John is already a fair hand with a shotgun.
Most importantly: you have friends, you are not alone, and we'll do all that we can to help keep you safe.
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Also, if you want to talk about firearms in Albuquerque… there's a guy called Ogre who is exactly what you need. I recommend him highly, as does Raven. I'll see if I can't get him in touch with you.
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I can help with this problem. [grin]
Which range is the one near you? I've been to Calibers (indoor pistol shooting range, they're super nice to me for being an EMT) and to a members-only range south of town. That one requires that you bring all your own equipment, though, so you have to have your own gear before it's worthwhile. You can rent at Calibers.
I strongly recommend that you first take something like an NRA basic pistol class, and then rent and shoot a bunch of different guns to figure out what you like and what fits your hand the best. It's best to go with a couple of sane, sensible grounded friends, and at least one person who already knows what they're doing. Sadly, the number of people who say that they know what they're doing is greater than the number of people who actually do. But you can make new-shooter friends at your class, and a substantial number of security geeks are also into guns, so I bet you have gunnie friends and interested friends already.
There are intro classes, including an all-women class, at Calibers, as well as the NRA classes (searchable here -- there's a First Steps pistol course Thursday, December 1st and a Basic Pistol on Saturday, December 17. (You can go straight into Basic Pistol -- in either of those courses, they'll take the totally new.) And, of course, you can get instruction from friends. If I make it to town next week (possible!) I would be delighted to take you out shooting, show you the basics, and answer any questions that you might have that I know. And if I don't know, I have a pretty good local expert that I can ask. And if he doesn't know, well, I know a lot of gunnies. *Someone* will know. [grin]
You'll need eye and hearing protection before you hit the range. I suspect that you, like myself, will benefit from having smaller options than are generally available. This is a good summary of hearing protection. I use muffs, mostly, and I have spares, so if you go shooting with me I have enough for us both. If you prefer the in-ear foam plugs, that works too. I've had trouble finding those in sizes that work for my smaller ears with maximal protection (since decibel is logarithmic, that matters a lot), but I'm currently experimenting since I've been thinking of doubling up. For eye protection, I use these. Super cheap, ballistic rated (you want that!), and actually fit my face. Most of the eye protection things out there are made for people with much bigger faces than mine.
Also worth looking at: Kathy Jackson's site (and book) The Cornered Cat, and Packing in Pink. (I had their pink safety glasses for a while, and they made me very happy.)
If you want to do local martial arts classes in other ways than guns, I have recommendations for that too.
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(Anonymous) 2011-11-21 06:12 pm (UTC)(link)One other thing you may not have thought of - wedge your windows shut. I used to do it when I lived in the basement apartment over on Russell Road and could hear all the drug dealers walking by at 2am. It's simple enough to do: get a length of wood just slightly smaller than the distance from the edge of the moving window to the window frame . I.e. if you have sliding sash windows (sounds like you do), the wood should fit the length of the part that doesn't move, and block the moving part from moving. A 1" x 2" should do it, and align it along the edge of the frame so it's not easily seen from outside. This will prevent the window from being opened and slow down anyone trying to get in - or force them to break the window, which at least gives you a chance to hear them.
As for other forms of self-defense: I'd say a dog over a gun. It's easier for potential break-ins to see/hear that you have a dog, which makes them less likely to enter the house. You can google it; police forces often say having a dog is the number one deterrent to break and enters they've heard of. Fearless , growling, angry bundles of muscle with teeth tend to scare criminals...go figure...whilst the drawback to owning any weapon and keeping it in the home is that it can potentially be used against you. A dog can't.
This is why I still don't own a sword, despite studying the thing since 2004. too much potential for disaster. Anyway, I say all this, but I'm still not the one who had to talk down a nutjob in my living room. It's whatever makes you feel safe, in the end.
Take care!
Silvia
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There's not a really easy way to block them up, so what we did was add an additional latch hooking them together more tightly, and wire through the top curtain area to tie it shut, and the landlords have a contractor in to provide a more permanent and pleasant solution.