Birchbox really went out of their way to make the December box thematic:

And then you opened the outer layer....

As you can tell, I have a terribly feminine aesthetic, with the rose petal and the utility knife. The latter is holding the box open for the purpose of showing the inside. I'd intended to cut it out but once I started taking photos I figured I should just go all out. :)
Inside the box:

(Sewing machine spindle for scale)
After
trying a similar product in a previous box, I wasn't too excited to see this.
However, it turns out to be a
really lovely leave-in conditioner. I would even say it's a slightly better detangler/conditioner than my existing brand.
Incidentally, it smells pretty much the same as the other products in the line, which is sort of plant-fresh. I like it, but I'm not sure I'd go so far as to suggest that this stuff is an effective perfume.
The one thing I don't like about it is the packaging. The logo looks great and is legible in red-on-white, but I find it looks unappealing, cheaper, and is hard to read on the red plastic. Here's the comparison:

Price check: My existing brand is Herbal Essences split end protector something something, which I remember paying around $6.99 for 6oz ($1.16/oz) and currently
retails on Amazon for either $1.65/oz or $1.46/oz depending on how much you buy. Anyhow, Beauty Protector retails for $21.95 for 8 oz, which is $2.74/oz. Probably around double the price, maybe even more since you can get the drugstore brand on sale.
That's a pretty big difference for a fairly minor upgrade, but given that this will probably last me years and save me a little bit of detangling time every time I use it, it might be worth it to me. Definitely within the "acceptable personal splurge" range, especially since I can use birchbox points to get it.
PS - I presume that this is vegan like their other products, but I didn't actually see that mentioned.

When I heard that this was made by some actress who, upon spawning, felt a need to protect her children from evil chemicals or something I was frankly pretty skeptical. But despite the whole company inception story, I actually like the product!
This is a slightly thick moisturizer. How thick? Let me show you!

Not close enough?

Okay, maybe we're getting gross here.
It's not as thick as the more intense glycerine creams, but it's definitely leaving a residue all over your hands. I don't mind this as long as the product is effective, and it totally is.
It's got a scent that reminds me of the weird herbal medicines my German neighbour was always recommending (many of which worked; he was actually a pretty skilled herbalist), so I actually like it. It strangely reminds me of juniper, which is not on the ingredients list. The scent also not too strong to use around other people, and the packaging is cute, so it will probably be my new work moisturizer this winter. Woo!
It's basically a bunch of plant oils and beeswax. That doesn't mean it's safe, of course, but none of the plants in the ingredients list set off warnings in my brain at least, and they weren't making any outrageous claims on the package I received.
Even their website seems to make fairly reasonable claims about it, which is basically "this is a moisturizer that moisturizes." Incidentally, birchbox did not tout the diaper rash prevention properties. ;)
How expensive is it? It retails from the company for $12.95/3 oz ($4.32/oz). For comparison, our giant bottle of moisturizer runs around $0.73/oz according to Amazon, but that's probably not too fair because this is a much thicker moisturizer of a different stripe. My favourite thick hand creme is
O'Keeffe's Working Hands Cream (or as I call it "manly hand creme" since it's so clearly marketed at men), which retails for $2.42/oz on Amazon and less in home depot the last time I checked. Either way, Honest Healing Balm is expensive compared to my existing alternatives.
Manly, manly hand cream:

However, Honest Healing Balm is a little less thick, making it more reasonable to use at work or when I'm planning to touch things fairly shortly after applying it, so it may hit a useful sweet spot of "effective when my skin is actually damaged but not inconvenient to use." I would consider picking up more, although realistically birchbox seems to be meeting my "small tubes of moisturizer" needs pretty well.
Also, this is organic if that matters to you. And it will totally help with your diaper rash, or so I'm told.

I haven't actually tried these, because I'm saving them for travel purposes as they are in nice little packages.
That said, I'm going to mention there that baby wipes are generally much cheaper per wipe than makeup wipes, probably much better tested/safer, plus it's easier to find in unscented varieties. Of course, a washcloth is probably better (and more exfoliating!) but there are times I don't want to have all my washcloths stained with weird lip products.
Twistband's niche seems to be in making hair elastics don't share any of my priorities for hair ties:
My biggest concerns in hair elastics are as follows:
1. Does is stretch enough to go around my hair?
2. Does it hold my hair up for hours?
3. Does it get stuck when I try to take it out / does it pull my hair out?
4. Does it last for more than a few uses?
5. Is it cheap enough that I won't be sad when I inevitably lose it?
Twistband's big selling points seem to be:
1. This won't dent your hair.
2. It's pretty enough to wear around your wrist!
I suspect that this whole hair dent thing is a conspiracy to make people self conscious about stupid things so they will buy more stuff (see:
shame marketing), but I suppose maybe this is a problem for someone? But if it was, why did I never hear people say that scrunchies were good for this in the 80's and 90's?
As for #2:

Really?
This isn't a bracelet, it's a sparkly bit of elastic you tied a knot in. Don't kid yourself. Also, it itches, so I didn't leave it on.
This is reasonably effective as a hair tie, as far as I've noticed. (It's winter so I'm not ponytailing my hair for nearly as long as I would in summer.)
Did you know it's really annoying to take a selfie of the back of your head using an SLR? I tried anyhow, just for you:

So... yeah.
Twistbands run $12 for 6 on Birchbox, or $2.00/each. My regular metal-free elastics run around $0.10/each at the grocery store, and you can often find them at the dollar store for much much less. I'm pretty sure it's not worth 20 times the price to me (let alone more), at the rate I lose or them, so unless this proves to be indestructible and somehow never gets lost it's not going to win. Plus, I'm pretty sure I can get decorative elastic and tie it in a knot myself if I liked that aesthetic.
Oh well, at least it's a thing I can use.
EDIT: I originally listed these as $0.50 each, because I guess my brain couldn't believe that these were actually $2 hair ties.

I believe the colour I received is called "Ring of Fire" which is at least awesome. The colour itself is a nice bright red. It seems to have a little bit of a fuscia undertone in this photo, but I suspect that's due to a combination of the lighting (sunlight-off-snow because Portlandia is snowed under right now in a little freak of mother nature experience) and my very chapped lips:

Yes, I realize I am not the bestest at applying lipstick. Also, faces look weird that close. And SLR selfies are not a good idea. Whatever, I didn't feel like spending hours setting up lipstick photos today 'cause I was trying to get photos for for All The Reviews.
It applies fairly smoothly. I found it rubbed off pretty easily on glasses, my hands, etc, which was kind of annoying. It more or less feels like a lip gloss in that respect, and it might even a bit more moisturizing than most since it feels like it provides an actual barrier on my skin.

Apparently this small size (see with sewing machine spindle above) is available as a lipstick duo. Normally I am a huge fan of small lip products since I can stick them in my pocket and re-apply when I feel like it. Unfortunately, carrying this in my pocket has a bit of a problem. I was worried the issue would be in knocking off the cap, but that seems pretty good. However, what does happen is that the product gets rolled up and squashed against the top of the lid repeatedly:

As you can see, there's a giant smear on the top and the product is already listing to one side from being squashed all the way at the top.
So yeah, not a pocket tool for me. Perhaps LAQA & Co. needs to do a bit of testing on their packaging, as this happens
every time I have put this product in my pocket, and it even happens in my bag sometimes. In contrast, I have probably half a dozen different lip balms that get the same treatment and it's fairly rare to see them smashed up against the top of the cap. Perhaps it might be time to consider the classic square lipstick base designed to not turn when the cap is closed or something:

(No, that's not lipstick, but I only started buying lipstick recently so it's the only thing I've got in that type of packaging).
I'm not going to bother pricing this out because I'm not really considering buying it. I enjoyed receiving it, but when it comes to buying there are probably better formulae out there, definitely better packaging possibilities, and bright reds aren't that hard to find.
In summary...
One last look at the box:

I love the conditioner, I like the hand cream, I enjoyed trying the lip pencil and hair tie even though I will purchase neither, and I imagine the makeup wipes will be fine but I haven't tried them yet. Acceptable for $10!